"Emotional and/or Physical. Is It An Affair?"

The definition of what is a safe relationship with someone who is not your spouse is quite blurred by some. “It’s not an affair if there’s no sex.” “We only kissed once.” “We were just talking.” Healthy relationships can be had between members of the opposite sex who are not married, but when that relationship begins meeting needs that only your spouse should meet, a definite boundary has been broken.

This obviously means sex, but it also means emotional needs and anything else that is important to you. Your need for social interaction with someone or your need for admiration are some examples. All of the elements mentioned here are crucial to a marriage, and if they’re getting met elsewhere, the bond you pledged is in jeopardy.

That coworker you’ve been spending more time with is starting to do something for you. You begin feeling something you’ve not felt for your spouse in a long time. You can call it a fire or a spark, but it is also a sign of danger. While your marriage might not be all that you wish right now, having an affair will begin a very painful process. Do you want to go through that? Do you want to put your children through that?

The issues you struggle with in your current marriage can and very well may resurface in subsequent relationships. Plus, an affair is easy to maintain in terms of a relationship. There are no bills and you only see one another a few times a week so the best impression is always seen. If an affair is followed through to its logical conclusion, what do you have? A spouse and the system starts all over again.

We’re human and we must work on what is before us, so avoid the affair, and have an affair with your spouse. Meet him at a hotel or do something surprising like prepare dinner for her. The newness will set a fire aflame and the simple idea that you thought ahead will do wonders for your relationship.