What causes an argument between a husband and a wife? Two people are mad at each other. What can stop an argument between a husband and a wife? Somebody not getting mad and thinking with a level head. The goal is to get both to do this, but one step at a time.
The wife becomes upset at something, addresses it with the husband in a very offensive manner. Does she need to temper this? Sure. But the husband can do his part early on by deciding to not get upset as well. Self-control is an admirable trait.
There are two reasons the husband (or wife if the circumstances are reversed) shouldn’t get mad. First, if he’s done something wrong, he can apologize and by admitting fault in a humble way, the wife will really appreciate him. At least she will when she’s calmed down. It takes a big man to admit his mistakes and then to learn from them. The second reason a husband shouldn’t get mad is because if he hasn’t done something wrong and the wife is ugly about it, her apology will be that much sweeter. Be sure not to rub it in her face, though.
We all want peace in our homes and both parties have to work for it. Here are some tips on how to do this. Sometimes you’re spouse 1 and sometimes you’re spouse 2. The balance below can almost guarantee peace in your home.
- Don’t get mad at anything. This may seem impossible, but what good does it do? Getting mad won’t get the floor swept or materialize the forks that were forgotten on the picnic. Anger is typically a sign that effective communication isn’t occurring. We’re mad because we don’t believe we’re being heard. Talk about it. Don’t yell about it.
- Don’t be accusatory. Is he really trying to make your life miserable or is he just forgetful. If you accuse him of something, he will get defensive.
- Work to please your spouse. If you want to be happy, make someone else happy and he or she will do the same for you. Work to remember important dates and always meet his or her needs. Love in a home takes effort.
- Don’t get defensive. The issue isn’t about you. It’s about your family’s well being. If you’re constantly messing up, work to stop and become a better husband, wife, mother, or father. Then, your family will flourish.